Kay Yow: 'I Feel the Power of All These Prayers'
12/20/2006 12:00:00 AM | Women's Basketball
NC State women’s basketball coach Kay Yow knew that she would lose her hair when she began chemotherapy treatments for her breast cancer. She was prepared for that. And as it started falling out in clumps in recent weeks, she decided to go to her long-time hairdresser and have her head shaved.
First, however, she wanted to have a little fun, something that hasn’t been lying around in bunches since she found out her recurrence of cancer had begun to progress shortly before Thanksgiving. So the Hall of Fame coach had the hairdresser cut her hair short in stages, to see how she would look. She had her try out a spiky hairdo. Then she got a Mohawk. Finally, the hairdresser left one little sprig at the top, sort of a starter kit for the look Yul Brenner had in “The Ten Commandments.” Losing her hair wasn’t fun, but, as with everything she does, Kay Yow went at it with a positive attitude.
“Hair grows back,” she said. “I have scarves, hats and a wig. Losing my hair at this time is the least of my worries.”
This is the second installment of Coach Yow’s message to all the fans, cancer survivors and cancer patients who have worked hard to lift her spirits as she continues her fight against cancer. More messages to her are also welcome.
_ Tim Peeler
NC State Women’s Basketball coach Kay Yow
At this point, I have been through one complete four-week cycle of chemotherapy treatments. I start the next cycle today (Wednesday, Dec. 22). The first week in the cycle is the toughest, because that is when I am taking all the drugs, loading up on the front-end of the cycle. I am anxious to see how I will do this time around, because I had a harder time the first week during the first cycle than I did during the other weeks. I feel like I sort of know the drill now. I am not taking as many of the pre-medications as I did that first week. I think all of that is going to help. Some of my other medications have changed and are working better in my system. I am hopeful that I am going to do better this time than I did the first time.
It’s really hard to tell, at this point, how much effect it is having. They want to know from week-to-week how I am feeling or if I had any pain or any nausea. There are a lot of side effects. I feel really blessed through the first cycle, even though I had a pretty tough time that first week. Things really smoothed out for me after that. I might be a little weaker and have a little shortness of breath. Overall, I feel really blessed. I know there are people who are a lot sicker with their treatments and have a lot more pain than I have. I think I am going to do better this week.
I really praise the Lord for all the e-mails, cards and letters I have received, and also for the special gifts people have sent me. There have been people who have prepared some very healthy meals for me and I appreciate that. The response I have gotten has been overwhelming. It all has been so uplifting and so encouraging. There are many people who are praying for me and I feel the power of these prayers. I feel strengthened by them. People have sent me poems and letters and scripture to look up, and there are a couple I would like to share.
“Cancer is limited”
Cancer is limited.
Cancer cannot cripple love.
Cancer cannot shatter hope.
Cancer cannot erode faith.
Cancer cannot destroy peace.
Cancer cannot kill friendship.
Cancer cannot destroy memories.
Cancer cannot silence courage.
Cancer cannot invade the soul.
Cancer cannot steal eternal life.
Cancer cannot conquer the spirit.
Cancer is limited.
“A Grateful Heart “
Lord, thou hath given so much to me
Give one thing more:
A grateful heart,
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse
May be Thy praise.
Philipians 4-6
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your request be made known to God.”
Psalms 54-4
“God is my helper, the Lord is the sustainer of my life.”
I have gotten a letter from a soldier in
I have also heard from others who are battling cancer. There was an 18-year-old basketball player from
There are a couple of things I learned a long time ago that have helped me. I have always believed that attitude is the key to success. I have just always believed it impacts your relationships with people, that it impacts your work ethic, your determination, your willingness to make sacrifices. If you look for the positive and the good in everything, then you see things completely differently than if you are always looking for the negative in everything. It’s a daily battle, no matter whether I had cancer or not, of having circumstance-control versus attitude-control. Circumstances control attitude or attitude controls circumstances. If you can let your attitude control the circumstance, you have such a better chance of dealing with everything in life.
Many times we have little or no control over circumstance. I feel like that with my cancer. But we have 100 percent control over our attitude, because attitude is a choice. We have to make the choice to find the positive. My way of doing this is focusing on God, rather than on the circumstance. I am looking for ways that God is helping me grow through this or how I might help others get through. Focusing on Him helps me with that. When I focus on God, rather than the problem, God becomes great and the problem becomes smaller. But if I focus on the circumstances, then that becomes great and God becomes smaller. I want people to understand that attitude is a choice and we have to make a choice to find the positive.
I give my mom, Lib Yow, credit for teaching me that there is a silver lining in every dark cloud. She was a great lady and she got me on track early about things like that. She used to tell me “The man without shoes felt bad until he met the man without feet.” It’s a matter of getting your perspective right and understanding that your ability to deal with obstacles and adversity has everything to do with whether you will really have a chance to be successful.
This time of year, I can’t help but think about joy. With my faith, the word “joy” has always been an acronym, in which J is for “Jesus,” O is for “Others” and Y is for “Yourself.” If you prioritize things that way, that is how you have real joy. Not just happiness, but joy. That would be the same if I didn’t have cancer and I was just dealing with daily battles, those things would apply no matter what.
I want to wish everyone a most joyous and most blessed Christmas. I also want to thank the Wolfpack athletic family for the get-well card that was in The News & Observer the other day. I really want everyone to know how much I appreciate that.
One last thought that I will be thinking of this week: God also promises a soft landing, but he never promises a smooth flight. I am pressing on, with God’s strength.